Category: Horoscopes AV

  • Pisces 4-5-26

    Better grab a hazmat suit and a shield because crap will be hitting the fan today, Pisces. The vibes could have you feeling like a hot mess. Karma may be a b*tch, and today will be about seeing what you’ve generated with your choices. To navigate these strong energetic vibes, take ownership of the issues that you can control. Your ability to see all sides will help you determine what you can and can’t control. Taking action will help remind you that the Universe never dishes out crap — just lessons that you have the power to learn or ignore. Once you climb into the driver’s seat, today will be so much easier, Fishy!

  • Aquarius 4-5-26

    This day could feel a lot like taking a bath in rubbing alcohol after getting paper cuts on 95% of your body. Not. Pleasant. But it doesn’t HAVE to be, Aquarius. Luckily, if you’ve stayed on top of issues and have been working to face them, you may find that stuff turns out better than you thought it would. However, if you’ve been avoiding things like the plague then, well, you’ve made your bath, now get it in it! Either way, there’s a lesson to be learned. When you decide to take control over what you CAN change, you ultimately help yourself. Show off your mad skills and charge at your problems, WB.

  • Capricorn 4-5-26

    Confucius once said, “Stop complaining about what you can’t change and get off your ass and do something about what you can.” Okay, so maybe I made that up. That’s still a solid life motto. Decisions you’ve been avoiding could show up with the consequences of any inaction today. If you’ve been working your ass off to achieve your dreams, you might start to see some rewards from your efforts. The vibes today will be all about seeing how your choices impact your life, Cappy. Courage is a strength of yours, so if you really want to make some changes, get your bravery on!

  • Sagittarius 4-5-26

    Sundays are meant to be fun days, right? You may be rethinking that today, depending on how well you’ve been balancing your life and the decisions you’ve been making. Don’t worry, Saggy, this can still be an amazing day, but the vibes could be bringing on consequences of earlier decisions (no, not just the hangover from the night before either). If you’ve somehow made choices that screwed up your life and don’t love what you see, seize on your personal power to change it. “Whatever you’re not changing, you’re choosing.” Own your power, and make this day exactly what you want.

  • Scorpio 4-5-26

    Ever wondered what it would be like to ride to Hell in a handbasket? Well, you just may find out this Sunday, Scorpio, and it probably won’t be nearly as fun as you’ve imagined. The vibe today could be bringing some problems to the battlefront. Now, if you have stayed on top of your game through this screwed up year, you could just discover that this war will be easier to win than you’d imagined. But if you’ve been sticking your fingers in your years and yodeling, “LALALALA” the whole time, you’ve brought an army of mutant sharks on yourself, pal. I hope you have a handbasket at the ready! But, Scorpster, remember that once you put your mind to working towards a solution, not even a whole army can stop you! Are you fierce?! Hell yeah! Are you ready to get through this Sunday? Let’s fecking DO this, buddy!

  • Libra 4-5-26

    If you’ve been tripping over bodies on your way to the top rather than lending a helping hand, it could catch up with today, Libra. The energy today could bring to the surface issues that you’ve been avoiding or consequences of choices you’ve made. Good choices yield good consequences, but bad ones…. Well, you may need to pull on some boots for the crap you’ll be wading through. Don’t worry; you’re not screwed completely just because you tripped time or two on your way to achieving all your goals. If you don’t like the direction you’re going, pull up your fancy undergarments and make your life what you want rather that something that happened to you.

  • Virgo 4-5-26

    NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER. Sure, the Universe may try to back Virgos into the corner as any difficult situations you’ve been dealing with could come to a climax. Unfortunately, if you’ve been putting things on the back burner because you didn’t want to deal with them, the results might have you bracing for impact. On the other hand, if you have stayed on top of issues in your life, you may find that this spit storm doesn’t have enough power to mess up your hair, let alone push you backwards. Either way, deciding to take control over what you CAN change will be key to getting through this day. Plant your feet firmly on the ground, V, to better keep your precious balance. It’s time to show the Universe what you’re made of!

  • Leo 4-5-26

    The Universe will be making you breakfast this Sunday and the main dish will be a huge helping of what in the world is going on, served with a side of hashbrowns! Lion, if you’ve been sailing on higher vibes and really staying on top of issues, you may just find that stuff turns out to be better than you imagined. If you’ve been struggling to put on a brave face and maybe have tried ignoring your problems, you could be in for a stale breakfast biscuit. So, this Sunday, spit it out and take decisive action and have brunch on your own terms. Take that, Universe!

  • Cancer 4-5-26

    Cancers are the type of people who imagine that the clouds are dragons and dream of riding them away towards the end of the world. Unfortunately for them, this Sunday probably won’t be full of fluffy clouds. Instead, get ready for a tsunami slam of reality. If you haven’t asserted your will or made conscious choices to work on your issues, what you get today will be a result of your inaction. You see, Crabby? One does not simply dream their way to Mordor. It takes swords, bows, and axes to work your way towards solutions. Uh, figuratively, of course. So, get your butt off the grass and your head out of the clouds. These super waves could become as calm as a ripple on a pond’s surface. The key to change is within you. Time to take action!

  • Gemini 4-5-26

    Sit down and get ready for your world to start shaking! Today, Geminis could be faced with an earthquake from the tectonic plates that have been moving towards them. Those problems that have been building up in your life? Whether you’ve been preparing to take cover or have been spending your time ignoring the warnings will seriously impact how you get through these seismic tremors. You are NOT the Universe’s victim, but in order to deal with problems, you need to actually DEAL with them. You dig me? Prepare for battle, Gem. It’s deal o’clock.

  • Taurus 4-5-26

    Damn! Ouch! Quit that! Nothing hurts as much as a gut-punch of truth, am I right? The vibe will be strong for bringing situations to a head, and whether or not things go well will depend on the choices you’ve made. Problems ignored may come in like a hit, Bull, while problems you’ve diligently tackled with your passion and determination will likely resolve better than you ever thought they would. If you find yourself doubled over and aching, don’t let it disempower you. You’re never a victim of fate, and today will be no exception. Use whatever happens today to push you toward your goals. You are amazing and a tenacious badass — capable of achieving anything.

  • Aries 4-5-26

    Kaleidoscopes are pretty, right? Until you pull them back, and you’ve got a black eye. Don’t get punked by the Universe today, Aries. It can be easy to get lost in your daydreams and forget that you actually have to do something make some progress, amIright? Any inaction might just back up on you like a disgusting toilet in a one-bedroom studio apartment you have to share with the world’s grossest roommate. Refusing to make a choice is still a choice, and today you’ll want to use this energy toward making progress. Remember: you are a badass. Go forth and act like it!